How to manage roommates and shared living space.
For many students, moving into a dorm is their first extended stay away from home and their first time with roommates and sharing their space with someone who isn’t family. Dorm living can be the best or the worst part of someone’s college experience, it all really comes down to the roommate you choose. While the fit does not have to be perfect, you definitely want to be with someone you have similarities with.
Upon getting into UGA, I started scouting Facebook and Instagram pages for roommates and thus began the “speed dating” process to find the perfect match. I would go shopping, get my nails done, or grab lunch with a girl, see how we meshed and moved onto the next until I found the perfect one. While my freshman year roommate and I had our fair share of disagreements and spats, we sobbed together when we had to move out because she had become one of my absolute best friends throughout the year. Throughout the year, we learned to respect each other, find common ground, and address issues like adults.
The best way to avoid conflict throughout the year is to establish ground rules before even moving in. Discuss with your roommate what you are and are not okay with so that way there is no question where you stand on issues upon move in. My roommate and I were both exceedingly social, so we both agreed that guests were allowed in the room at all times, as long as we verified with each other first to make sure that they weren’t studying, sleeping, etc. We also decided that overnight guests were perfectly fine, but we wanted to know when someone was staying over.
Another thing we decided on was that each other’s clothes were totally shareable; she was able to go into my closet whenever she needed something, as long as she washed it after she wore it. We also agreed that no illegal items were allowed in the room at any time. Thankfully this was easy because we were both under 21 and neither of us took drugs, but it was still nice to be reassured that this was not going to be happening in my room ever.
Having someone who agreed with me on the topics of sharing clothes, guests, sleepovers, etc was extremely important to me because I wanted people to come to hang out with me and I didn’t want to annoy my roommate when that happened. I have other friends who did not establish these guidelines before moving in, and they were stuck with a roommate who hated guests, who had illegal items in the room, who brought boys over all the time without asking, who would eat their food, etc, and they regretted not talking about those things before the move in.
Should problems arise, the first step should always be to have a calm discussion and look to compromise. Talking openly and honestly to your roommate is the easiest way to avoid conflicts and resolve issues. If your roommate will not resolve these issues with you, a great resource is your hall RA, they will help buffer the conflict and aid in moving towards resolution. In rare cases, sometimes a student may need to switch rooms and find a new roommate. This has to be done through The Dawg House.
Madeleine Morris, UGA Intern
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